Global Warming Hoax Weekly Round-Up, Feb. 27, 2009

By The Daily Bayonet

Hej och välkommen, or hello and welcome to the weekly round-up. Thanks to the Swedish blogger behind klimathot I’ve been getting a lot traffic from Swedish visitors, hence the warm välkommen. Here’s some more Swedish: Ikea hope you know how much I Volvo your visits, so much so that I’d be very Saab if you stopped visiting.For readers not relying on Google to translate ye olde snark, this week’s round-up is the last until this is over. I’m hoping I’ll only be gone for a few weeks, but until I am back enjoy this weeks edition and stay skeptical with the excellent sites listed for your convenience in the Daily Reading sidebar.

Part One: Al Gore and Friends

Al’s inconvenient African proverb. Global warming prophet profit Al pays no serious attention to Africa, the entire continent is inconvenient for greens, which may explain why they try so hard to kill Africans.Gorebot Millionaire?Domo arigato, Mr Gorebot-o, but your hoax just met a Godzilla sized inconvenient truth and collapsed like a cheap futon under a Sumo wrestler. Al pulls a slide, world gasps, did he read this?Don’t forget to wish Al Gore a happy hoodie-hoo day. Spoof Goreblog headline of the week: Climate Criminals Shoot Down Global Warming Satellite.A failed Presidential candidate interviews another failed Presidential candidate; alarmism ensues:


Al Gore and the bad Apple.

David Suzuki is a grumpy old hippy:

“When I was born in 1936, just over two billion people lived on the Earth. The population has tripled since then. Each of us now carries dozens of toxic chemicals embedded within us, cancer has become the biggest killer, and we have poisoned our air, water, and soil. The human rush to exploit resources or take over territory has devastated terrestrial and marine plants and animals.”

“I once sold a hoax this big”

He’s also interfering in politics again, telling the people of Alberta that the leader they elected is unfit. It’s surprising he didn’t demand Ed Stelmach be jailed, after all that’s just what totalitarians do.

Part Two: AGW Scaremongers

Plants are on death row. Would it be so wrong to point out that it’s the greens that want to strip plant food (CO2) from the atmosphere? Idiot leftist and uber self-promoter Arianna Huffington’s online paper supports planet-killing ethanol. How do alarmists cope with the inconvenient lack of warming? By moving the timeline, of course. How many lobbyists does it take to sell a hoax in DC?

Green lobby
A green lobby. No, really.

The ice harvest. Spare a thought for those brave souls that venture into the frigid cold each season, just so you can enjoy a scotch on the rocks. China’s eco-village will be a demonstration of just how well green plans for sustainability will work. Oh, wait.Shark attacks are down, global warming NOT blamed. Tom Nelson fact checks alarmists that ridiculed a dead guy for not publishing any peer reviewed papers since his demise.Global warming is speeding up, a pretty good trick for something that has not happened for ten years.Cracked earth causes global warming? I guess scientists have to justify staring into a crack for two years somehow. Insert your favorite proctology joke here. The keeper of my favorite list of all things caused by global warming is upset at being left off the who’s who list of deniers. Grab your Global Warming Survival Kit here.Global warming muppet Jim Hansen should be fired. Give NASA credit where it is due, this week they achieved an impossible task and found something that crashed faster than Hansen’s credibility.


Sienna Miller, spokesmodel for Global Cool, has an inconvenient carbon footprint. Sienna Miller has feet?Ontario’s government finds a new way to raise cash from the green agenda.The alarmists at Grist have decided to copy The Daily Bayonet’s model of bringing humor to the global warming circus:

Grist is an online news source for everything environmental. Their mission is to publish environmental news and commentary, spiked with a sense of humor and designed to motivate readers to take action on behalf of the environment.

Bring it, bitches.Earth Hour is only a month away. Last year I found that leaving all the lights ON was like hippie fly-paper, but that’s not as fun as it sounds, Birkenstocks really tear up the lawn.Alarmists are alarmed that the New York Times has gone wobbly on promoting the global warming hoax. What do hippies have against soap anyway?

**** you too, dude

Some half-wit called Steve Best thinks that Senator Inhofe is the top terrorist threat in the world. I challenge him to say that in Afghanistan, Osama Bin-Hiding might have a thing or two to say about his claim to the title.

Part Three: Inconvenient Truths

A-Chu. After the Gore Effect we now have to watch out for the Chu effect . It’s a Climate Chu-chu-chain of fools.The mayor of hippie-central, San Francisco raised hypocrisy to a new Haight(Ashbury) as he was caught hauling bottled water in his SUV.Ahem, it’s the sun, stupid.

Sun size
still think it doesn’t affect climate?

Feast or famine? The other side of the CO2 debate.Is your company switching to green IT? Suckers!Leftards exert political pressure on skeptics.An inconvenient spoof: Wind turbines damage the planet. (h/t reader Paul)Australian’s efforts to reduce their carbon footprint are a waste of time, so chuck another hippy on the barbie Sheila.The greens are losing the global warming argument debate, despite a massive funding advantage. If it wasn’t for you pesky facts…No warming since 1997. How inconvenient.It’s the big yellow ball in the sky, stupid.Trees like CO2 so much that they’re munching more of it every year. (Note to any kids reading this, yes, trees have big sharp teeth.)

Killer trees
It will eat children if the CO2 runs out

The greens love electric cars, but what happens when the power goes out? Meanwhile, sales of hybrids drop faster than a narcoleptic at a Gore speech.It’s Sol, TardusCarbon trading, meet markets.Kallyvornya, not enjoying the green so much now that the green has run out.When your hoax is falling apart, change the rules.

Part Four: AGW in the News

Global warming has a press agent.The Washington Post’s freudian slip is showing.The UK’s Daily Mail wins alarmist headline of the week: “Alligators off the UK, deserts in Europe, cities under water: What will happen if the world warms up 4C by 2050”

Going underground
Future Site of the London Aquarium

President Obama backs off the green agenda, Americans breathe sigh of relief.British hippies are told to tear down their eco-home. Because it has no parking. You can’t make this stuff up.Climate versus economy. Pick one.Questions arise about global warming in the UK.Solar panels in Hollywood: Measure B from Outer Space?Oxymoron of the week: Media Credibility.Press on press fight, the National Post v National Geographic.

Part Five: Global Hottie

I mentioned this week’s hottie above, she was taking some flak for her footprint. I cannot verofy she has feet, but feel free to inspect the image carefully to see for yourself. Sienna’s a greenie at heart, but no one’s perfect and I for one choose to forgive her. Skeptics, be nice and say hello to Sienna Miller, your global hottie for this week.


That about wraps it up, thanks for reading and I’ll see you soon.

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